Tory Spain
Pursuant to last month’s speculations concerning the May 22 elections, they did indeed result in the widely anticipated slaughter of the PSOE by the PP’s tsunami.

To be fair, it was more about the Socialists being punished than by people really thinking the PP were any better, which is typical in a two-party state such as Spain, as we voters swing from one to the other and back again because to contemplate a third or even fifth approach to politics is beyond our hamster-driven brains.

The raging waters have only settled somewhat. In a number of places pacts had to be made for governments to be formed. Said pacts often dealing with the little-people parties when an extra vote or two made the difference where they normally wouldn’t. Izquierda Unida gained ground, and in possibly the next four years could surge to become a viable third party at the national level.

As expected and demanded, the new PP rulers are almost daily announcing cuts and are pushing through audits to assess the real financial situation of the various fiefdoms, the most risky of these being the autonomous regions which are increasingly being blamed by outside observers as the weakest point in the Spanish economy, so burdened are they by debt and inefficiency.

A Spanish historian I was speaking to the other day remarked how Spain’s problem has always been structural, meaning, instead of placing qualified and productive people in jobs, they prefer to fill those jobs with family and friends and arse-lickers. The consequence of this is obvious: a full house of people ‘working’ but a house which functions badly. Governments at all levels everywhere are now being forced to do something about this, so we have, for example, Granada where they have ditched a large number of ‘consultants,’ thus saving the province the waste of millions of euros (many assessor positions are simply sinecures).

Salary cuts, merging of departments, and other fat-cutting measures are the order of the day. We won’t know for a while yet what the impact of these actions will be, but as the financial terrorists (as Max Keiser of Russia Today calls the bankers, the IMF, etc) continue to attack countries far and wide, Spain must shape up or ship out like Greece is about to do.

My own opinion is that apart from what Brussels or the markets and speculators say, for its own sake, Spain has to tighten the screws of its system so it will function in the interests of the people, and not for the continued enrichment of a bloodless financial system that has no home anywhere unless Greed can be called Home.

15M still on the Move
The 15M movement continues to pressure the political system with demonstrations and sit-ins. Recently in Barcelona politicians had to be flown into Parliament via helicopter as the masses wouldn’t let them walk in the traditional way.

It’s worth noting here that outside observers have warned that the debt situation of Catalonia alone could bring down the Spanish economy, and that is exceedingly worrisome.

So constant and determined has 15M been that their ideas are even being discussed in the Cortes (the Spanish parliament). It is refreshing to see new attitudes being so audaciously put forward. It is called ‘standing up for yourself, for your rights.’

The movement is not participating in illegal acts, nor can it be described as criminal. Just regular folks of all ages rejecting the hubris and advantage to which the political classes feel naturally entitled.

BILDU Stands Firm
While most Spanish politics remains chained to the same gangsters as always, with the resulting identical ideologies and same old tired policies, at least up in the north of the country some new developments are taking things in a different direction.

As discussed in last month’s issue, Bildu, the supposed front for ETA, was allowed to participate in the May elections and actually did really well, becoming the second largest political force. Like the mainstay PNV party, they seek an independent Basque state, if not at least greater autonomy from Spain.

Their success has angered many who in typical knee-jerk fashion claim Bildu is nothing more than a cover for ETA, meaning, we now have terrorists elected and in power. But clearly many Basques do not feel that way as the voting revealed. Anyway, some Bildu-run town halls have taken the unusual measure of banning bodyguards from government buildings, saying they are not necessary. Bodyguards for politicians have been a common sight for years owing to ETA’s threats and assassinations.

Those who tend towards the sinister would say that Bildu is trying to make politicians vulnerable; those who don’t, might see in this Bildu wanting to convince people that ETA really is stepping back and down as they themselves have been claiming recently.

Another new measure they have touted is to reduce the number of security forces in the Basque Country, saying they don’t need that many, which would entail budgeting less funds for their support. Again, the same argument can be applied. It sounds to me as if they know that ETA is basically over and possibly even have ETA’s word for it.

It’s certainly a strange development, but perhaps a most welcome one if true. On an end note, they also want to remove the King’s picture from the plenary hall in San Sebastian, as well as cease to pay towards the Royal House. This last however sounds reactionary to me. The King’s a good old dude, he played a serious role during the 1981 attempted coup, and of course it is thanks largely to him that Spain left Fascism under Franco and moved towards the hopeless mess of democracy we so enjoy today.

Abusing the Bus Lanes
Authorities must really be getting desperate when they resort to fining authorized buses for using restricted bus-taxi lanes. These lanes were created to expedite the flow of city traffic by giving priority to public transport, and cameras were installed to catch infringers, so what exactly was happening when Barcelona bus-driver, Alberto Fontaneda, received in the mail a fine of 200 euros for stopping his bus in a bus lane to let passengers off and others on?

He promptly got onto the appropriate web page to appeal this silliness but no response was forthcoming and the confusion began to multiply. The Town Hall eventually declared the fine null and void but claimed Alberto had not let anyone know, and that it was the bus company which had told them.

In these cases, the individual is held responsible not his or her company, which seems absurd when it’s a matter of public transport. The point is it took several months for the issue to be sorted out, without anyone in charge really knowing what was going on, and when they did, they weren’t capable of notifying our badly put-upon driver of his innocence. This story demonstrates that too much bureaucracy only stifles our daily efficiency, a common enough occurrence in modern-day Spain!

Let’s get Naked
A young German of 27, on-board a Madrid-Munich flight, decided to remove his clothing not long after take-off, which bothered not only his fellow-passengers but also the flight crew, whom the man attacked after they attempted to get his clothes back on.

The commotion was sufficient to force the pilot to return to Madrid. Authorities report that the chap apparently had suffered some sort of mental breakdown. You might call the whole thing a big cock-up.

Idiot Award
Public nudism has its merits, but for sheer unmitigated audacity how about this: no driving license, not wearing a seat belt, speeding, talking on his mobile phone, drunk, and trying to bribe the Guardia who had stopped him: off-stage massive applause if not a standing ovation.

This 24-year-old man was detained on the outskirts of Madrid early one morning and offered the agents 150 euros, suggesting: “let’s just forget about this, right?”

He was nearly three times over the legal alcohol limit and basically fell down when he got out of the car. I know the traffic system is quite strict now and it would be nice if they’d ease up on us a bit, but extreme behaviour like this cannot go un-punished.

Ingenuity Award
It is said that desperation is the mother of invention, so how about the story of Krzysztof Grzegorz M., 29 and Jouoastaw K., 31? Their modus operandi was for one of them, measuring nearly 1.8 meters to hide in a large suitcase that his compatriot then lugged into the bus hold, and during the trip the contortionist got out of the suitcase and rifled through the other passengers’ bags looking for anything worth stealing, which he then placed inside his own large suitcase before re-taking his own position inside.

Once at their destination, the accomplice would pull out the large suitcase and off they’d go to tally up the haul. When police, after co-operation from passengers, opened up the suspicious suitcase, they found the man inside, with a mobile phone in one hand, a head-lantern, and a small bag full of stolen objects. I can only imagine the looks that must have passed between the agents and the curled-up contortionist.

Conflict of Interest?
So there you are; utterly browned off with the system, participating in the massive 15M protests and part of the occupying force in Madrid’s Plaza del Sol, demanding ‘Down with the System, Away with the Politicians, and wanting Honesty and Transparency and Bread (not circuses) for all, and at the end of a hard day, working for the interests of the poor and down-trodden, you arrive home to find you’ve won 1.3 million euros in the lottery.

Hmm, decisions, decisions. This is exactly what happened to one of the 15M protestors, who obviously believed, contrary to Mark Twain’s assertion that “lotteries are a tax on idiots,” in a part of the system that you might say is a bit of a free lunch.

It remains to be seen what the young man will do with the money, but it will clearly be a struggle between integrity and greed.

Public Telephones Called Out
The digital age did away with vinyl and cassettes, and now the massive appeal of mobile phones has over-whelmed most of the need for the old telephone booths and the accompanying white pages which Telefónica has announced the end of.

Add to this new initiatives by the Government in making broadband available to all, even to those who live in the back of nowhere, and it does make sense. Phone booths will still be available, but in a seriously reduced quantity, and phone books will be available only on demand. Vandalism and lack of use have paved the way for our future in the cloud and on the digital move.

Intellectual Property Defended
As discussed in last month’s issue, Spain’s new Sinde Law aims at curtailing internet piracy by preventing Spanish users from accessing web pages which in one way or another facilitate the downloading of copyrighted material.
And now the EU, inspired by, among others, the Sinde Law, has decided to adopt similar measures as well as to get the Internet providers involved in the fight to combat piracy.

EU commissioner, Michel Barnier, of the Interior Market, says in the next few months certain new measures will be put into place. He looks to Holland as a leader as that country has a very restrictive policy concerning the regulation of the Internet, and plans to study in greater depth the Sinde Law.

France, he points out, has a system where infringers are given three warnings before having Internet access cut off. In typical Brussels’ fashion, he is calling for a general EU policy to be followed by all members, involving a universal Digital Canon Tax and common approach to protecting copyright.

He does not like situations such as that in the UK where Internet providers are involved in a legal battle as they refuse to co-operate with the government who wants them to act as on-line policemen (Brussels’ answer to everything is to make all of us walk and talk and sing the same way, as if difference and distinctiveness were crimes.
Well, I’ve got news for you, Michel, you pillock). This news is merely one more sign of how control and power, just like in everyday European life, are coming to dominate our digital lives as well.

Record Fine for Power Giants
The five major energy giants have been fined by the National Anti-Monopoly Commission a whopping 60 million euros after they were found guilty of price-fixing and making it difficult for users to freely choose their energy provider.

The energy market was theoretically liberalized three years ago with all sorts of bombast about how the user would be given much more choice, but this has obviously not happened. While we complain a lot about the constantly rising prices in electricity, the truth is that successive national governments have caused the mess by refusing to recognize what energy actually costs, and so have subsidized it, which has led to a huge deficit in the energy sector’s accounts.

In other words, they’ve been owed a lot of money for a long time. Still, that’s no excuse to stiff the average Joe and Jane. After all, it’s not our fault what policies the Government practices, only that we, doorknobs, voted them in! Just say No, Arghhhhhh!

Spain in a Nuttyshell
Okay, here goes! A German man in Mallorca has been charged with not only abusing his own children, but also forcing them to perform sex acts on each other, filming the shameless perversion and then putting it on the Internet. Nice.

Up in Lérida, a court has ruled in favour of a Jehovah’s Witness who was forced to accept a blood transfusion, which is of course against his beliefs. Fair enough.

In Bilbao a young woman wanted to go out and party so badly that she left her children at home alone. Neighbours alerted police about two small children, aged two and four, who were crying on a balcony. Upon entering, the police also discovered an 8-month-old baby on floor. Jesus!

A recent survey has revealed how 90 percent of the managerial class approves of bribes and ‘gifts’ as a valid part of their business activities. Of course!

In Valencia, a man’s been convicted of drugging his wife, her sister, and one of their friends, in order to libidinously have his way with them, as you do. What the hell is wrong with these people?

(News: national news, Spain)