The concept, “when doing something illegal, keep a low profile,” is one that eludes some people, especially those that grow illegal crops in cellars.

The Guardia Civil received a complaint from a landlord in Belicena (Near Santa Fe) to say that their tenants were damaging his property. When a patrol went there to speak with the tenants and take a look for themselves, they found 825 cannabis plants…

These green-fingered gentlemen; i.e., ‘funny farmers’ had installed a complete irrigation system and had, thoughtfully, hitched up to an adjacent electricity supply.

Consequently the culprits have been charged with an offence against public health, as well as energy theft. Two of them were present when the police called and the third had conveniently supplied his name, NIE and home address on the rental contract so he was soon picked up.

But the Guardia have been busy bunnies elsewhere, too, because they also came across another illegal plantation consisting of 802 plants in an urbanización called Loma Verde in Albolote. The 32-year-old owner of the house-cum-jungle had his nipples tweaked and the soles of his feet beaten with a sullen kipper… I might be lying on that one, mind.

(News: Belicena, Santa Fe, Vega, Granada, Andalucia)