No News Is Good News

We start this month’s news with the rather unsettling admission that there isn’t really that much to report. However, I did manage to get to the inauguration of the Espinar roundabout, which was attended by the Mayor, and there are also some other bits and pieces that I will endeavour to stretch out in an interesting way.
Despite speaking with all my spies and contacts, they could only give me little snippets of gossip and hearsay, which, as you well know I would never put into print amongst these pages. However…
A local page 3 model wannabe has expressed concern about being overworked, in fact, she now claims that she washes up, serves the customers and so much more. The name of the bar escapes me, but when she’s not exposing flesh for local magazines, she can certainly whip up a mean burger!
If boxing is your sport, just pop down to La Herradura on any given day or night and you will more than likely enjoy more fisticuffs than on TV’s The Big Fight Night. It seems that 3 wives were in someway insulted in the village, which was followed by 3 people receiving what Bob Hoskins once described as ‘a bit of a slap’. Again, my sources have little in the way of names or places, and it could all be rumour and conjecture, as there have been no complaints made to police about the said ‘slaps’, and there is no video or photographic evidence of them being delivered. Or maybe the ‘victims’ just thought they probably got what was rightfully theirs in the form of a ‘respect reminder’ package.
The other main rumour in the village is that the wife of local ‘news hound’, who can’t rustle up a decent story to save his life, is pregnant and has moved back to the UK, to avoid the shame of admitting the baby is possibly someone else’s… Word is, the said lady hasn’t paid for a bottle of Butano in months! The said ‘news hound’ has been seen wandering aimlessly around the village alone, claiming he can’t remember which people he is allowed to talk to or which bar he’s allowed to go in, without getting himself ‘blanked’ by anyone.

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