Exit The Big Bad Wolf

ftr-danish-jesSure, I like animals, don’t get me wrong. I’m more or less one myself. I have a lady horse friend on the mountain behind my Spanish residence that I occasionally feed carrots to, in return she kisses me with her somewhat raggedy mouth leaving a horsey scent for me to take home.

My wife Gretha won’t kiss me for a while after my horse dates. Still, I love animals. Well, of course there’s the killer snails in the garden. Ok, also the poisonous jellyfish in the sea. All right, some of the dogs are not so cute, those that leave droppings in the street for me to step in or bark or howl when I want to sleep. Apart from that and from those, I love animals.

We Danes are an animal-loving nation.

Except we are a small animal loving nation. You know, Chihuahuas are fine for a small country, their droppings are also smaller than most. But when it comes to wolves and wild boars, things are a bit different. The farmers hate them, and the hunters are foaming from the mouth to get out there and shoot them. So now we’re planning on building another wall.

Since the only words US president Ronald Reagan got famous for, “Mister Gooorbatjooov, tear down this wall” there have never been so many walls in the world. Well, The Berlin Wall came down in the end, the iron curtain too, but everybody is building walls these days. Not to keep everybody from leaving their countries, but to keep everybody else from entering their country.

But animals too have rights, and there are walls for animals too. Wild boars are crossing our sacred borders, and we don’t want them here. They make odd noises, make droppings in the woods, they root around the ground and they might carry diseases. So Denmark is planning on building another wall. 70 kilometers long along the German border and one and a half meters high to keep the wild boars down there where they belong. In Germany. The Folk Dancer’s Party, Dansk Folkeparti, would like the wall a little higher, though. To keep out other creatures than the wild boars.

It might be an even larger project if – God forbid – the Danish-German border changes as often as it has done since the 1864 war. We’ve had our little quarrels with our neighbours over the years. Some would say that not only the wild boars but also the wolves are a phenomenon inspired by our neighbours.

In later years wolves have crossed Danish borders to try to make a living on this small spot of land. The farmers want the wolves out-a-here, though most attacks on sheep and pigs and calves and other livestock are carried out by stray dogs. To spoil the sport for hunters who want wolf heads above their mantelpieces it has been suggested that the wolves are kindly and Danishly escorted out of the country.

Along with the wild boars, I assume.

(News/Feature: Danish Viewpoint)

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